...while playing Story Games.
Inspired by the RPG.net thread about Mr. Welch.
1: I am no longer allowed to use "Hey, baby, wanna upgrade my mech?" as a pick-up line in Bliss Stage.
2: I am not allowed to play the following characters in Bliss Stage: Kamina, Simon the Digger, Yoko, Gai Daigoji, or any character from Gundam Wing.
3: My ANIMa's primary weapon is not the Shining Finger.
4: Especially if the Shining Finger is a manifestion of my hatred for the Authority Figure.
5: ...And is delivered with the middle finger.
6: Dogs in the Vineyard is not an appropriate system for running a Sailor Moon game.
7: Neither is Bliss Stage.
8: I am not to describe Dogs in the Vineyard as "The Mighty Mormon Power Rangers" to any potential recruits.
9: I am never again to have the Authority Figure in a Bliss Stage game scream, "RESPECT MAH AUTHORITAH!"
10: Just because he has less than 5 Intimacy with his Anchor does not mean that Keenan Caine got her pregnant by kissing her.
11: "Fribblefrabble" is not currently part of GNS jargon, and I am no longer allowed to imply that it is.
12: When the Mountian Folk woman tries to seduce me when I am pumping her for info, I am not allowed to fold and describe hot sex with her.
13: When the Mountian Folk woman tries to seduce me when I am pumping her for info, I am not allowed to raise with a description of hot sex with her.
14: On a related note, I am no longer permitted to get my Coat's dice during a conflict by removing my Coat.
15: Bliss Stage is not an appropriate system for running a Paranoia game.
16: Neither is Dogs in the Vineyard.
17: I am no longer allowed to have FATE aspects inspired by Kobolds Ate My Baby, including but not limited to Tastes Like Chicken, In Heat, and ALL HAIL KING TORG!!!
18: I am allowed to refer to a sexual relationship as being at "Intimacy 5." My Bliss Stage character is no longer allowed to refer to a sexual relationship as being at "Intimacy 5."
19: 4chan Memes cannot be in any way involved with all future games of Shock: Social Science Fiction that I participate in.
20: My Spirit of the Century character cannot be the Spirit of Cheese, nor of Big Pimpin'.
Add to the madness as needed.