Bite-Sized Actual Play - June 2014

edited June 2014 in Story Games
From last night's game of "Everyone is John"...

John wakes up. One of his voices tells him to rub cat shit all over himself. He complies. He burns himself on his hot plate while cooking some rancid SPAMTM, and the pain snaps him out of his reverie. Noticing (as if for the first time) that he's covered in feline feces, he showers and heads down to the nearest convenience store to get some KOOL-AIDTM as directed by one of his voices. Unfortunately he gets mugged on the way, and awakens in an alley one hour later, broke, and with a headache.

No matter for John, right? As instructed by his voices, he finishes the walk to the convenience store, goes inside, and start mixing up some KOOL-AIDTM right there in the aisle, sprinkling the power directly into a gallon water bottle and spilling water all over the floor. Not surprisingly, the shopkeeper is upset and threatens to call the police. "Fuck You!" John shouts between massive swallows of the delicious sugary drink, giving the shopkeeper the finger.


The shopkeeper pulls a gun out from under the counter and tells John to leave in no uncertain terms. John tries to charge him but fails miserably to vault the counter. He ends up laying on the floor and bleeding from a bullet wound in his right shoulder. Shopkeeper grabs the phone and is about to dial 911, but John hypnotizes him into believing that his nipples are on fire. This buys enough time to escape out the back door. In the alley behind the store John meets a friendly wino, who informs him that his shoulder is bleeding and offers him a drink. John snuggles down beside the man and begins stroking his ratty hair, whispering "go to sleep... go to sleep now..." This doesn't work at all. The wino is creeped out. And now there are police sirens coming this way. John bids farewell to the wino and heads north to the edge of town, where he stumbles out into the woods, slumps down against a big old tree, and calls for his animal friends.

Squirrels, mice and birds of various kinds begin to assemble around him. John welcomes them to his open arms and strokes them lovingly. He smiles and sighs: "AT LAST I AM A DISNEY PRINCESS!"TM


  • edited June 2014
    I GMed The Devil, John Moulton twice in the last two days (at Origins Game son Demand). Both times, the game ended in a sordid tale of betrayal and PC on PC murder.

    In the first town, PC A tried to murder PC B's illegitimate daughter. The father, B, was gonna have none of that, so he went to kill A. A had an occult trick up his sleeve though, where he could make anyone forget the thing they most cared about until they slept. So he used his sorcerous power on B, ending the violent struggle... for a time. (Meanwhile, PC C kills the daughter, to regain their own occult power.)

    In camp that night, A realizes that he has a problem, cause B will just awake angry as before, and A can't keep brainwashing him forever. So he decides to murder B in his sleep. But as he puts the gun to his head, B whips around and grabs it. It turns out that B was awake, and he had his own demonic power to use, the World Breaker's Hand. A's pistol dissolves into ash at B's touch. B raises his own gun and fires. Fade to black, end of game.
  • "playtesting is basically like eating broken glass while flirting"

    Caroline, summing it up perfectly.
  • From our Feng Shui 2 playtest session:

    So, Yang is the Killer and the daughter of the Ascended's #1 guy in Hong Kong. She knows nothing of the Ascended and wants to walk away from her family. Her father agreed, but first -- her melodramatic hook -- she must do One Final Job for him first. Paul, formerly known as Doc Panda, is the Big Bruiser. He walked away from the Triads, so they want him dead, so... everyone agrees that we now know who the Killer's target is.

    Naturally, they're currently fighting together (Paul unaware that he's her target), alongside Philip the Old Master and Alexander the Thief, who also happens to be the Killer's ex, (He went to steal something, but he made two mistakes! First, he stole her heart. Second, he left his own in its place.) and Jasmine, who has it in for the Killer for killing her brother. This particular fight is against goons accompanying Rance, who works for Yang's father.

    As the fight is winding down, the bad guys, except for Rance, are unconscious. Rance recognized Paul as Doc Panda and asked Yang why he was still alive. He also pretended that he was shocked, shocked, I tell you, that the people accompanying him started shooting up a hospital. Totally not his idea, nope, no siree, and Yang and her friends had stopped them, which was great, and she should stop all this talk about leaving her father.

    Yang: I'm done with my father. (draws her gun) I just have one last thing to do --

    And she shot Paul --

    Who fell in slow motion to the ground as Alexander called out his name and Jasmine turned to attack Yang --

    While Rance turned and walked away --

    Only to be stopped by Philip, a clearly harmless old man, who touched him --

    And took him out with that single touch --

    Rance fell unconscious to the ground, knowing that Doc Panda was dead.

    Alexander: Nice shot! That's going to bruise!

    Paul sat up, merely winged by Yang's bullet, and Jasmine didn't attack Yang.

    Philip, who had helped the thug's target escape and called for aid, looked around him at all of the property destruction -- in a hospital, no less!

    Philip: What kind of a mess are you making?
  • In the most recent Eternal Lies session, Martin, the least combat-capable PC, managed to avoid a kidnapping attempt despite his companions being elsewhere, by using extremely dirty tactics, including, in a reverse-pick pocketing, dropping a lit lighter into one of his would-be kidnapper's pockets.

    Martin: Lillian, if somebody tries to kidnap you, I will light them on fire. Through their pockets.

    Lillian: Oh, that reminds me. We need to get you another lighter.

    Martin: Immediately.

    Later, Joyce was pounding pavement, talking to people and doing such scouting and reconnoitering as could be done easily. She learned that the current villain had a yacht, and went to take a look at it. As she knows about shipping lanes and harbor practices, she spotted at once that it was in the way. This infuriated her.

    Joyce: It's one thing to be a cultist and try to end the world. It's another to go against the laws of navigation and the oceans of the world and free shipping thereunto!

    The player explained to me that this was to Joyce the Net Neutrality of the 1930s.
  • Finished up Origins by playing Medical Bay Three. In the end, Jason Morningstar started a revolution and an intergalactic war in order to save a single life.
  • We had a great game of In a Wicked Age. Highlights:
    - One player was the heart of a leopard, trapped in a girl's body. The girl was craving to marry someone, for in the wedding night, she would become fully human and banish the leopard inside her.
    - The command of a ghostly army decided to be nun again, because she realized her goals were futile.
    - An ambitious hedge wizard has a flashy thing, a neuralyzer, and paralyzes a whole wedding party.
    - An insignificant servant of the ghostly army can rip out hearts and amasses incredible powers. Even though he's undead, he changes sides and is the last hope of a kingdom which is oblivious to the danger it faces.

    As always, In a Wicked Age had the highest Intrigue/Drama per Session ratio. It was a pleasure.
  • (Nick, to be fair, I saved two lives.)
  • edited June 2014
    Playtesting Microscope Union:

    One night Nathan walks out into the fields of his farm and simply disappears into the night sky. His wife Belle is left alone to raise their son, until the day he returns from the stars to say goodbye…

    "My Dad, he’s full of stars!"
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